Monkey Business

Did you see the gorilla? Only about half of the people did, even though the gorilla stood right in the middle of the group beating his chest.

In a study by Daniel Simons, people were asked to count the number of passes of a basketball between three players wearing white T-shirts. There were also three players wearing black T-shirts. During the short study, a gorilla walked right through the middle of the group, but people were so focused on counting the passes that around half of them completely missed seeing the gorilla.

When they watched the video again, this time looking for the gorilla, it was obvious, but then they missed other things. The curtain changed colour and one of the players wearing black left the study, yet people didn't notice those changes either.

It was a great reminder that things can be right in front of our eyes, but if our focus is somewhere else, we can completely miss them.  It got me thinking about people and what we are missing.

How often do we think we are making it obvious that we are struggling, lonely, overwhelmed or simply need someone to notice, but the people around us have no idea? Equally, how often do we miss really seeing others who are right in front of us? Neither of us are invisible but we just haven't truly seen each other.  The truth is neither of us might know the true extent of being overlooked, because we feel we are very visible.

How often do we focus on what we think we should be looking for, rather than taking the time to see what is right in front of us.  We can be busy thinking about where we're going, what we need to do next, what someone is saying or what is happening in our own lives, and completely miss what is happening right beside us.

So, the question is, who, and what are we missing? This week, why not stop somewhere you usually go and put away the distractions for ten minutes. Don't take your phone out, or rush, but just look around and really notice the people around you. You might find the person who most needs to be noticed won't look like they need anything at all, and you might find the biggest thing you miss isn't something hiding in the background but someone standing right in front of you, quietly hoping to know they matter.